iqra

so in my book club, we are reading fountainhead by ayn rand. this is the second time i've read it, and i'm very, very glad i picked it up again. because otherwise i never would have known how wrong my first impressions were!

actually, i shouldn't say my first impressions were wrong- those were my impressions then and there isn't any right or wrong when it comes to connecting with and having a response to a book. but today, if i hadn't read it again, i would still believe that this book was one that i counted among my favorites.

since junior high, age 11, i have loved this book, recommended it, pushed it upon people, felt it speak to me. at that age, it certainly did speak to me- i was only 11, with half formed and unformed philosophies and ideals. i was still learning about individuality and ego and all things ayn rand, and at the time, her words were revelatory to me. they were the first that had ever spoken such a message to me. they were the first that had ever ventured to say to me what today seems obvious.

today, i am not impressed. i am not bowled over, awed, astonished, reverent, driven to recommend this book to others. today, i am bored by ayn rand's little tome of transparent speechery.

but i'm still thankful to it. because it changed my life at the time that i needed it. i'm glad the first time i picked up this book was not now. because then i never would have learned anything from it- i never would have actually become a little bit stronger and better because of it.